We all seek to find a loving and caring partner, yet most of us fail to find that special person. How can so many people who desire to find someone special, intermingle thousands of times with others, and still remain so separate? What is behind this intense need to get together? And why do we fail so miserably?
From birth we start to accumulate unconscious belief systems about every conceivable thing -- fat-thin, short-tall, richpoor, young-old, smart-dumb, sensitive-insensitive, etc. These belief systems cause us to grow apart from other people. Since the needs of our belief systems are unconscious and unknown to us, we have little chance of ever providing the response expected by another person's belief systems. When we are rejected by the other person and fail to "connect," our feelings are hurt, and we experience intense pain that we call loneliness. However, we survive and end up creating a belief system that says, "In order to survive and not experience rejection, I must be lonely."
To avoid loneliness, we force ourselves to mingle with any available person. We seek a mate we don't want and endure horrible marriages and wonder why we feel more empty than full. We endure these painful situations because we don't know that we have unconscious belief systems that can be discovered and eliminated.